It’s been yay-long now since we returned home from our venture to the Mexican Borders. Perspective in its entirety began to take form immediately upon our arrival back to Canada, and yes, I’m still conversing with the occasional curious folk about the situation we bore witness to.
Anyone who comes back from diving into a 3rd world experience usually expresses the same feelings, depression, worthlessness, and while some come home with a new perspective on their fortunate living conditions, others may grow resentment. Discontentment. Hatred for earthly unbalance. This was me. I’m glad I waited this long to post my reflection blog, a chance to calm down, otherwise my post could have possibly raised a concerned eyebrow or two from the reader.
When we returned home from Mexico, I was able to repress my feelings towards society, as it wasn’t 2 days before My cousin and I were off to Vancouver to see if we could hitchhike across Canada with a Guitar and a little bit of money. I was able to avoid the material obsessed 1st world I’ve been struggling with for years. I came home from that around the beginning of July and began, what I’d call a rough adjustment back into civilization. It was a very angry time. An Old Testament version of Joel appeared demanding an eye for an eye. There was a while there where I would fantasize about heading south, to the ‘beast’ (railroad Migrants use to head north), where I would acquire a sniper rifle, sit high up in a tree, with the train in view, and begin to snipe off any of those no-goods, getting in the way of others’ honest quest for a better life. Put as many bullets in them as I can until somebody put a bullet in me. Go out, guns-a-blazin’. Dark, hey?
Then Jesus said to him, “Put your sword back into its place. For all who take the sword will perish by the sword. Do you think that I cannot appeal to my Father, and he will at once send me more than twelve legions of angels? But how then should the Scriptures be fulfilled, that it must be so?”
The idea to raise awareness of the issue back home is lost on me. So many people are already committed to so many causes. What’s another cause to them? One has to find something they’re truly passionate about, but pressing it on others can typically only push people away, or patronize you. I’d have to say I disagree with writing letters to our local politicians, at least for me. Hopefully some of you have taken on the mission to spread the word, but I am not a marketer. I am a labourer. I want to apply myself, one person at a time. Anything less is mere propaganda.
And Jesus called them to him and said to them, “You know that those who are considered rulers of the Gentiles lord it over them, and their great ones exercise authority over them. But it shall not be so among you. But whoever would be great among you must be your servant, and whoever would be first among you must be slave of all. For even the Son of Man came not to be served but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many.”
I don’t enjoy being the type who looks at everyone living contently in the 1st world in disgust. Wondering how they can do what they do, when there is so much that needs to be done. Nobody likes that guy. It’s hypocritical, especially as I too am residing in Beautiful 1st world Canada – problem free. To leave now would be an act of pride, and arrogance. I’m working on channeling my frustrations in a productive manor. Clearly, I’m a little bit lost on my journey, but I’m learning. I’ll make sure it’s done with the Jesus Christ stamp of approval.
I think back fondly of all you chums I got to know in the month of May. Throwing 10 strangers in a van to hash out some serious issues abroad gives way for an interesting experience. We were all there, processing our own emotions with peers who were all doing the same in their own way. We challenged each other, supported each other, we were a good team. I can still hear Megan apologizing every time she spoke because she thought she was interrupting.